I must say, as a non-teacher, this text was brutal to read at the start. But, once it started discussing the different approaches to teaching Rhetoric & Composition, it started to catch my attention as I started recounting some of my worst and best memories as an English student.

As I’ve mentioned plenty of times before, the reason I switched universities was mainly because the curriculum at MSU was getting extremely redundant & mundane and I started to feel like Coraline”s father:

I was tired of reading the same white old men over and over again. We were going through at least 10 novels in one class, which didn’t allow me to digest much anyway. We did discuss important issues as well, but it was always in the context of the 18th to 19th century. I want to learn about my present. So the routine became: read novel, discuss in class, write paper, read novel, discuss in class, write paper, read novel, etc. It gets old quickly.

What really disheartened me was that when I decided to continue my graduate studies in English there, I did not have any opportunity to explore the creative writing aspect. It was all academic and I felt like I was just fulfilling that 5-paragraph essay quota I used to in high school. Thankfully, I survived & saved myself by going through with the decision to switch.

I will say that not every professor was this way, but those that were overshadowed the good ones. Something that Lauer also brings up is the act of revision of student’s work. I can only imagine how tiring it is to be reading countless papers on the same topic, but if I’m writing a 10-page research paper and I receive a disappointing grade on it with ONE revision comment…..how am I supposed to understand where I’m lacking? Of course, I can go to ask for more in-depth feedback & I did. But, it would end in the professor telling me what to write, rather than giving me options on how to improve.

Again, there were good apples too. The professors that thrive on that spontaneous kind of teaching that keeps me alert in a 3 hr class, but it was typically the creative writing professors. Why can’t that teaching be applied to the heavy literature studies classes? In the end, I’m grateful for my time there but even more so that I recognized what was wrong and did something about it.

These articles went so well hand and hand. To start off, Bud Hunt makes valid points and brings up issues I haven’t given thought to enough. The debate of paper vs. screen has been around since I’ve started school really. Still, I’ve always felt like my generation is existing in this transitional period. But when Hunt talks about this debate, he points out that it’s really no debate at all. It’s really about the coexisting of the two and how the use of screen & paper are beneficial depending on our goal.

With my writing, I’m definitely a paper kind of writer. I can’t open a google doc/word doc/notes app/etc. and sit down to write something. I really think it’s because I associate that act with academic writing, my least favorite. It has to do with research and quotes, which are all things I pull from the internet. If I do any creative writing on a laptop or something, it’s because I have a solid foundation I’m working from and I’m really just editing/refining the piece.

Writing creatively onto paper just feels more freeing and it captivates my focus so easily. I also loooove physically seeing the spiderweb that forms after I’ve thought-vomited on the paper. It’s kind of motivating for me to see how fast & active my thoughts move from one to the next and I do think it’s something you can only see with paper. Yes, they have apple pencils and the pages app, which does the same but you simply can’t recreate the sound of your thoughts being transferred to real life. I rest my case.

But again! This just reiterates Hunt’s point. I do use both digital & physical, but I chose which is better for whatever writing task I’m taking on.

With that being said, it’s pretty clear how much I loved Lynda Barry’s work. I mean it’s the definition of the spiderweb I mentioned before! I read Hunt’s article first and when I read Barry’s, I was just like “mhmm, yup, exactly” the entire time.

The idea of journaling is not so new to me, but the ways I’ve approached it has changed drastically throughout the years. On my bookshelf, the oldest journal I have is from 2015 (junior year of high school). Very fitting time. That year I had my favorite English teacher that everyone else hated because she made us Really Write. She was the one who motivated me to go for my English degree. She saw my potential no matter how hidden away I tried to be and it felt good.

So I started my first journal. Looking at those old journals has become a once-a-year routine because of how cringe, yet endearing those entries are. I can tell I was so conscious of my thoughts and it made me afraid to write any honesty. What if so and so reads this? What if I die and this is gets released to everyone I’ve ever known? Typical 16 year old mentality. Yet it isn’t. I still catch myself doing this today when I start my journals. It’s like I have to break them in.

“Every time I start a new journal, I feel like the first entry needs to be clean-cut & fixed. Like if these entries were all that my loved ones had after I passed, I want them to start on this entry and feel like their reading my unpublished autobiography. But that’s never the case.”

That’s my first entry from my current journal. It’s hard to kick bad habits. But! I’m aware that I do it so I actively try to write more honestly and vulnerably as I move on to future entries. Once I’ve reached the middle to end, it’s drawings, collages, and whatever medium I felt like trying that day.

Reading these articles together gave me better insight as to how I approach certain types of writing or even creativity in general. I’ve always tried to be mindful of this in order to help me branch out, but reading about other writers’ creative processes is comforting & inspiring.

Pic 1: Lilly & I waiting in line for front row; Pic 2: In El Salvador, my village below me; Pic 3: My cousins, sister and I; Pic 4: Mindlessly crocheting on NY subway; Pic 5: Photo walk in NY; Pic 6: Treehugger in Maine

Since I could remember, I’ve stood in shadows watching the world go on and on and on around me. People watching is what they call it, but I’ve only recently realized it had a name. I was the shy kid in class with all the answers sitting in the back of my throat choking me up when I spoke, but I’m working on it.

That’s not to say I’ve always been on my own. Platonic relationships are what keep my world turning. My best friend of 10+ years was attached to my hip once we simultaneously found our love for music &, later, the live shows that came with it. We’ve been to over 150 (+counting, it’s a problem) concerts together. With that, we’ve also gradually become apart of each other’s families.

Coming from a Salvadorian household, I’ve placed family at the forefront of my world. Both my parents were immigrants in the 1980s and came to the US seeking refuge from the war in ES. My mom was pregnant with my oldest brother, making my siblings & I first-gens, making me the first to graduate college.

I graduated with my BA in English from Montclair State University in Winter 2021, started my MA in Fall 2021, and quickly realized I was no longer benefitting from the same chunk of classics being read over & over again. I also began working for a non-profit that aimed to highlight Women of Color literary voices and I knew I wanted a more diverse learning experience. So, I took a leap of faith and transferred into Kean’s Writing Studies Program with nerves & an itch to start new.

Im excited to venture into a new side of literature. I’ve always gravitated towards poetry because of the endless avenues it can take you on and from the looks of it, electronic lit is just that. I can’t wait to see what I, and others, create.